Epitaph

Lines of stones. All of them marking someone dear. Someone that has left us, someone whose time here found its end. Maybe it was too short, so brief that we can't understand or it was a long journey with well earned rest.  Was it full of hardships or joy, loneliness or being loved, what matters is the remembrance.

An evening of All Saint's Day.

I walk the path that has become familiar during the years. Up the stairs and past the church. Few rows forwards and then turn to left. As I walk, I slower my pace and take off my hat the closer I get. It's my way to pay respect for those that I don't know. I go past the last rows and arrive. My eyes start to glisten. I feel something in my throat and I barely can swallow. I wipe off the little bit of first snow that covers the stone. I find it hard to think about right words, let alone saying them.
In this silence, I turn towards my wife. Tears are cascading from her eyes. As I hold her I can feel that she's shaking, not restlessly but enough to know that she grieves. To know that the loss weights so heavily on her heart. We both mourn, but I don't clearly know what does the agony of  a mother feel like. Certainly, it must be tougher for her.

I kneel down to light a lantern. A small gesture but it's all I can do. Everything else feels so impossible.

"May the small candle burn in the greatest darkness.
May the light it gives shine bright.
 May it remind us that you are still with us
Even when we can't believe it


Always in our hearts
Your loving parents."